It's getting better! Lucy is feeling the love again for Mama and this new schedule is working out even better than I could have hoped. Most importantly I feel like I get so much more time with Lucy in the afternoon through the evening, it is truly awesome! In addition to to my Lucy-Mama time with this new schedule I also get so much more done at work in the early morning hours when there are no walk-ins, phone calls or breaks to chat with my co-workers. I feel so much less stressed trying to get everything done because I have three solid hours to non-stop, bang away at my "to-do" list so that even if my remaining hours at work are full of interruptions I still get so much more done that before.
I thought it was going to be really hard getting used to waking up at 4:45 am...suprisingly, it isn't hard at all. In fact, I feel so much more awake when my alarm goes off at 4:30 am (I'm a big time snooze hitter) than I do when my alarm goes off at 7:00 am. It's crazy. Sure, I get a little sleepy in the evenings but as long as I go to bed by 10:00 pm its nothing a little coffee or tea throughout the day can't remedy. Also, can I tell you how nice it is to walk out of the office at at 3:00 pm? Into actual daylight? In the winter? Amazing. Also amazing...no traffic! I zoom (and by zoom I mean I may go a wee bit over the speed limit) through the empty streets in the morning and in the afternoon the only bit of traffic I run into are the school buses, and that's only if I'm running late. Once the weather gets nicer and it is lighter later I'm going to dust off the jogging stroller I bought at a garage sale last year and start taking runs with Lucy in the afternoon. This body needs it and I'm really looking forward to it, fresh air, sunshine, time with Lucy and still making the $$! This schedule makes me so happy!
Lucy is so much more responsive to me now, it really did break my heart when she was snubbing me. I know I can't take it personally, after all she's just a baby, but I'm not going to lie when and say that it didn't hurt when she refused to say "Mama" for a week.
Me: "Come on Lucy say Mama."
Lucy: silence and side eye.
Me: "Ma-Ma, say Ma-Ma. Mama loves you."
Lucy: silence and crinkled nose.
Me: "Maaaaa-Maaaa. Mamamamama"
Me: :: sigh::
Now it is all MamaMamaMama. Mama this, mama that. On Saturday morning she woke up next to me, rolled over and patted my face and said "Momma?". I love it! However, for some reason she is still having a extremely challenging time going to sleep at night. We haven't had a hard time getting her down for bedtime since she was 3 or 4 months old. Since then we have read her books, given a quick snuggle and the laid her down in her crib and without a peep she'd be off. Now...she screams like a banshee. It's slowly getting better but man, I thought we were in the clear. She still sleeps with us half the night, and I wouldn't trade it for the world, but it would be really nice if she felt comfortable enough in her crib again to start out in there at least! PS. Co-sleeping is awesome. I still think its one of the best things we've done. Period.
Thank you for all your encouraging words last week. It was rough, add on my raging PMS and you've got a trainwreck named Bev. My doctor wasn't lying when she told me that the IUD makes that time of the month worse...it is terrible. I wouldn't mind just plain taking it out... hmmm...what does that mean? I'll let you take what you will from that. Am I crazy? Discuss.
"Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom. "